


(A+) Parenting Skills

by loki_god_of_sexiness



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Crack, Gen, seriously, so very cracky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-26
Updated: 2013-02-26
Packaged: 2017-12-03 17:30:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/700843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loki_god_of_sexiness/pseuds/loki_god_of_sexiness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Whenever Loki goes asking questions, the All Father always seems to fall into the Odinsleep.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(A+) Parenting Skills

“Odin.” The snore that issued from the All Father’s mouth seemed impossibly louder than the last. Frigga tapped her fingers impatiently on the bed.  
  
“ _Husband_.” He shifted in his sleep. The queen sighed. “The last time, surely you remember what came to pass. You were too coward to tell our son  _where babies came from_ , and now you have an eight legged horse sleeping in the stables. Do you want such a thing to happen again?”   
  
If anything, the next snore was louder.  
  
After centuries upon centuries of dealing with this, one would think Frigga would be used to this. And oh, she was. But that hardly meant that she  _condoned_  it. The people, and unfortunately their sons, were under the impression that Odin had fallen into the supposed Odinsleep. Of course, such a thing did not exist.  
  
It had started when their youngest had seen a pregnant maid, and nervously stood in front of his father wringing his hands before blurting out one simple question:  _Father, where do children come from? The tutor wouldn’t tell me and you and Momma have had two…_. There had been a moment of silence, the king looking rather panicked as much as his cool mask would allow, and then there had been some rather dramatic groaning and choking sounds before Odin had slumped against the throne. Loki’s eyes had been wide, his mouth hanging open, and then he started crying. He had always been the more sensitive of the two. The confused guards had rushed forward to take care of the king and prince, one of them carefully leading the small boy to Frigga. When told what had happened, she too had been panicked. Before, that was, she actually saw the man. After living eons with him, it was obvious from the moment that she walked in that he was hardly  _asleep_. She hadn’t brought it up that time, but the times after that, she certainly had.  
  
The next time the Odinsleep took the All Father, it was when the trickster was on the brink of puberty, but not quite understanding the world as he would come to. He and Thor had been gifted abnormally large hunting dogs from visiting dignitaries from Alfheim, and Loki quickly got attached to his pet. One afternoon, while Loki was in his lessons, the dog had escaped. For a few days, Loki sulked about, and then word had come that they had found its remains on the outskirts of the forest. By that time, the mischievous prince had gotten anxious for his dog to come back, and while Frigga and Odin were having tea on their balcony, he had raced out to ask what happened to the creature. That year, the realm mourned for the temporary loss of their king. Frigga got a headache trying to reason with the bull-headed, and sleeping, man.  
  
"You stubborn idiot. Talk to him!" Nothing, save a minutely unhappy grunt.  
  
It was pointless to argue with the oaf, and with another exasperated sigh, the All Mother sat back in her chair without looking at her husband. Whatever happened, it was on his shoulders, not hers. When Loki, now the king (and oh, what a proud mother she was), returned to their chambers, she dutifully played the role of grieving wife. She made sure that Loki sat near the bed, and to bring up small things that might guilt her husband into not being an ass this time around.  
  
When their son went falling into darkness, she knew the consequences had been much greater this time. It had cost them their child. Not Laufey’s. Laufey never had to explain where exactly babies came from, he never had to tell a small boy that his best friend had gone on to Valhalla, never had to give advice on cravings and morning sickness, and never once had he had to watch as his son fell apart while there was nothing he could do to stop it.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [this prompt](http://norsekink.livejournal.com/11337.html?thread=27152969#t27152969) on Norsekink.


End file.
